Time’s Up for Insecurities: Marriage

Time's Up for Insecurities: Marriage

Talk about figuring stuff out. Marriage has been a repeated “woosah” moment for 27 years. Initially, my insecurities were so overwhelming that I placed undue pressures on our marriage which really could have torn us apart. I was fearful of our marriage turning out like my parent’s – absolute chaos. When I shared my feelings with my dad, he said matter of factly, “Shorty, one day, about seven years from now, you’re going to wake up and wonder why did you get married. Baby girl, turn over and go back to sleep. We all ask of others to do what we have been unwilling or unable to do for ourselves. Make sure you are happy with yourself and tell him to do the same. That way, ya’ll can keep being happy with each other.

Just be yourself, Shorty, not me, not ya mama, just yourself. He will still love you. I promise you.”

I realized my greatest insecurity was feeling vulnerable and committing myself to someone for the rest of my life. This meant I had to trust him to love me beyond anything I could ever control. And really, isn’t that what insecurity is about – dealing with circumstances that are outside of our control rather than dealing with those things we can control?

How has your need to control everything highlighted your insecurities?

How has your need to control everything highlighted your insecurities?