The angels smiled this weekend as two beautiful people agreed to share a lifetime of matrimony together. Family members and friends traveled near and far to watch the wedding ceremony that I am sure was created through a reasonable share of tears, sweat, and drama. It was something to watch the youngest granddaughter of our bunch walk down the aisle with her twin brother as her escort to meet their paternal grandfather to finish the walk to her waiting Boaz. The flashbacks of them being infants in a crib were so strong that all I could think is, “I remember when they were babies.” The more I remembered, the more emotional I became and only stopped when I got the, “Please don’t mama!” look from my teen daughter. This was her first wedding and she was looking at it through the eyes of a photographer – what angle would work best and the type of lighting (even though she was off duty).
As most time with weddings, it was good to see people you hadn’t seen a while. We laughed, sang, danced, and ate to celebrate the union. It took me a while to get to the bride and groom but when I did, I pulled her close and offered my time whenever she needed it as she walks this journey of marriage. I genuinely meant it because I take my attendance at weddings very seriously.
See, the reason this was my daughter’s first wedding is because I wanted the opportunity to explain to her what our role as attendants are for the bride and groom. By being there, every one in the audience agrees to support the marriage. We agree to hold the groom and bride accountable to honor each other and nurture the marriage. We should serve as ambassadors for the couple for good and bad times. Our presence should not stop just because the reception ends. When they return from the honeymoon, we should be waiting in the wings to offer support and encouragement as needed.
So, when I had the opportunity, I told her to call me whenever she needed to talk because the wedding ceremony was the easiest part. The pre-marital counseling is over. The parties are over. The reception is over and all of the tuxedos have been returned. The bridesmaids will settle back into their routine which does not include you as the center of attention. The family members will load into cars and planes to return to the daily tasks of getting about their business. This is the “real deal” and sometimes the “real deal” needs a “real ear” to listen. And as a real ear, I vow to take your vows seriously and not mold them to fit to make you always look right and the other wrong. I vow to help you remember what God says about your marriage:
Colossians: 3:14 – 19
And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.